Happily, you need not suffer. This Christmas don’t just get that special person in your life a copy of Cosmetic Surgery for Dummies, but treat them to the full makeover courtesy of Dr Stephen Greenberg.

As the Mail reports (“How to look like a million dollars this Christmas”), the New York plastic surgeon is offering a full top-to-toe “remake” for £580,000.

Imagine the look on your saggy, lined face when you realise that you’re off to the Big Apple for a three-month refit, including recuperation in a five-star hotel, 24-hour nursing and an image consultant.

And don’t worry about people gawping at you with unbridled envy writ large in their baggy eyes because you’ll also have your very own chauffeur to whisk you about town.

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